Selasa, 24 April 2012

Same Stories

Well, few days ago, i was googling about Bali and ehm, i found this interesting blog. Oh well, i think i have some similarities with the woman who is the writer of that blog.

Just like me, she like to have adventure in her life and she love to travel to so many places, whether it is in Indonesia or in other country. And another similarities, she just got dumped by her ex-boyfriend after three years being together. She supposedly married this year and the man she absolutely love choose another person, yep, he lied to her. Same case like me, huh?

Well...well...well... she and i may not know each other, but i feel simpathy for what she's been through. Some men are totally jerks. We, women, tried to find out what's wrong with us, why the man we love leave just like that, even blaming ourselves for not being capable maintain our relationship and bla bla bla. But maybe, the problem isn't lies between us, the problem is that men act as if they own this world so much so they can choose any woman they like. Sounds annoying? but it is true. My close friend even admit to me, saying he's a jerk and so most men. Pffffttt!!!!

There are many different people in this world, we may not know each other, but sometimes we have certain similarities between stranger we found on streets, or even on internet. For those whose wedding being cancelled because of the man left you, trust me, you're not alone. Many people have the same experience just like you and yet they managed to fight back. Be brave!
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Letter #10

dearest pyeoul.....
How are the things in denpasar? or you might be in malang? i don't know news about you anymore. I only keep you in my memory. Today is your birthday, isn't it? I remember it very well. I will not forget you, eventough you may already forgetting everything about me.

People say, one's person beginning is another person's end. Yes, i guess it is true and that principle applies to each of us. My love story with you came to its end, and yet your story with her have just begun. Life is not fair, me, waiting for you so faithfully and yet you throw me away as if i am worthless for you. Very mean, but i try to smile. Sun will shine to me, someday...
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Sabtu, 21 April 2012


Kau, ya, kau yang berdiri teguh
Tidak pernah sedikitpun pandanganmu goyah
Berdiri tegak, hadapi ombak
Sungguh konyol mereka yang meragukan tekadmu

Tapi, tahukah kau, hei, kau yang berjuang
Mimpimu tak lebih dari sinar semu
Bagai kristal - kristal rapuh terjalin jadi satu
Pecahannya menghamburkan jiwamu

Asamu hanyalah rajutan harapan buram
Yang dibentuk mega - mega awan kelam

Bukan, bukanlah kebodohanmu
Tak salah bila manusia berharap
Pada angan ciptaannya

Bukan, bukanlah salahmu
Tak mengapa bila keinginan itu ada
Apabila itu buatmu membumbung
Apabila itu membuatmu bahagia

Bukan, bukanlah lemah hatimu
Tak ada salahnya berusaha sepenuh hati
Meski ia permainkan diriimu
Hempas surutkan mimpimu di kejauhan

Wahai kau yang berpendirian kokoh
Dengan sinar mata keras bagai baja

Satu pesanku,
Hidup tak selamanya hitam atau putih
Tak semua cita - cita itu berujung baik

Janganlah kau dipermainkan
Perasaan bisu nan tuli
Agar tak sia-sia perjuanganmu

Bila kau ragu, janganlah kau teruskan
Agar kau tak lagi dilukai dengan kejam
Tunggulah hingga mentari bersinar
Dan menuntunmu pada jalan yang benar
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Minggu, 15 April 2012

The Man I Love

I am still loving him. That's true. But the man i love lived in my past, not the present time. I barely know you now, pyeoul. We've become stranger as we used to. I am no longer mad to the destiny. Things going as the way they supposed to be, i guess. 

Sometimes i do miss you and i try to find out news about you, no matter how small it is. And before i made the decision to do that, i remind myself how terribly things will going through me. Because i know, jealuosy ruin my mood if i found you talking about her and worse, i would cry for days, just because of you my dear.

And well, as i prepare myself, i take a deep breath. I said to myself, be brave erwita. You must accept the whole facts. Then....i found it is all less hurtful. I guess i do slowly letting you go. It is fine. I can't push things too much.

Yes, i love you, always and always. It never change, but the right version is : i love you pyeoul, as the man i know in the past, cause you are stranger for me now.
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Selasa, 10 April 2012


Why do i wanna work? This tiring part time job? well, i need a distraction. Eversince i went back from Bali, i found my heart torn into pieces, so i made a promise, i will not let sadness over shadowing my footsteps. All those tears are enough. I tried to put my mind together, focusing on my study. But then, i have so many free days in a week. I cannot waste my time crying. I must stop looking at the past and focusing on my future.

I decided i must fill my mind with something useful. So i apply to be a private course teacher. This job literally bring me everywhere. I went to many unthinkable places, really unexpected. Oh Allah, this job is eventually tiring.

But then, one thing for sure, this job only using my energy and my body bt not my mind. In my free time, i still think of my ex-soon-to-be-husband. I cannot lie that i always miss him, eventough we walk in different path of life now.

I miss you so much pyeoul. Feels like it's been forever since we separate..
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Letter #9

Dearest pyeoul

How are you my dear? Can I still calling you that? I hope you don’t mind, cause I always love you here. Well pyeoul, the weather are very cat and dog here. It’s sunny in the morning and as the day turn to noon, it changed t be cloudy. Well, I wish it won’t rain soon or if it’s need to be rain the please, just a tiny rain, I have errand to go to library today. Not really an errand but just because I miss going to library hehehehe .

You know pyeoul, eversince I work as a private teacher I barely have time to go to library. Cause I always on road, moving from one house to another. At the beginning it was crazy, I took lots of schedule o teach, believing myseilf that I need to be busy in order to forget you. But at the end of the day it was all go for nothing but sickness. I got cold, typus and other disease from overwhelm tiredness.

My dearest foolish man, that act I did was really reckless, cause I did not think of myself. In fact, I am weak as always. Everytime I become busy I always sick. My friend warns me, she said I’d better taking care of myself because having typhi too often can lead one to a bigger and dangerous sickness. Well, I’m so thankful that I have friends remind me of that. Health is one of the most beautiful gift from Allah that we should keep it closely.

Oh woooooooowww. This kinda weather Is really make me sleepy. Cold air surrounding me. I need to knock my head and remember my purpose to go to library..hehehehe. well, I guess enough for now. I’ll writing again for you after I reach library. 

See you my dear. 
Always and always love you.
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Letter #8

a cloudy day here.

Hello are you doing now? How’s your bussiness going on? I really wished you success on anything you do. Well, it’s been quiet sometime not writing letters for you. Sometimes I myself feel missing it like crazy of writing letters for you. You are the one I can share my stories so honestly. The one I can share my thoughts of things, of events and so many other opinion on how life goes on.

I promised myself not to cry again, but just now tears are shed from my eyes. I cannot help it. I still loving you so much and I miss you very badly. I tried not to be selfish, that I should not think of you anymore and focusing more of myself, cause I know I need to love myself too, but I failed. Many times, pyeoul. I keep thinking of you, keep praying for any possible future with you. Call me a foolish, yes I am. Once I decided to give my feeling to somebody I cannot let it or crushed right away. It takes time and I don’t know when will I be ready to open up my heart again. This time around I just wanna be alone. I don’t wanna look to the outer world. Yes, just me and my tiny less complicated life.

Pyeoul, a mother I know she advised me this : don’t ever give your heart away 100%, you should give only 10% when you’re dating, maybe 50% when you’re engage and just 65% when you’re married, so when things turn to the other side you don’t want to (let’s say when you broke up), you still have pieces of your heart, so you couldn’t crushed entirely. Well, it seems very easy to say, bt I myself can hardly figure it out. I always believe you should give it 100% on anything you do, to show you’re committed to it. Because if it’s not 100% then it means you’re not serious in reaching your target. Well, I guess maybe I need to change my perpective. Hurting this badly from a relationship is hurtful and it feels so hard getting to my zero point, for I have fallen to a deep ravine. I miss you, pyeoul, eventough I only met you for three times of visit.

Yes, I couldn’t pretend to turn my back away, pretend like there’s nothing happen between you and me that you just a person I know from faraway. We created a dream together before, shared hopes, of what we wanna reach in future. It was beautiful, wasn’t it pyeoul? And I always want to remember you that way. Never I really hate you for I always love you and wait for you here, to comeback to me.

Yes, pyeoul. I love you.
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Senin, 09 April 2012


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What is Hijab? Hijab is the kind of clothes that a moslemah wear to cover her body, her hair and any parts of the body which not allowed to be seen by person outside her mahram.
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Tingkatan paling dasar hijab pada umumnya adalah kerudung yang menutupi sampai setengah dada, kemudian jilbab yang menutupi hingga dibawah dada dan hijab yang menutupi hingga ke pinggang. Macam-macam pemakaiannya juga banyak, ada yang secara konservatif dan sekarang juga banyak kerudung tipe gaul. Buat saya pribadi, segala jenis yang gaul atau konservatif itu tidak terlalu masalah asalkan memenuhi syaratnya yaitu menutupi anggota badan yang diharamkan dilihat selain mahram dan pemakaiannya sesuai occasion, yah meskipun saya pribadi lebih menyukai tipe jilbab konservatif dengan tidak terlalu banyak hiasan sana sini yang bikin ribet, warna yang kalem dan ga norak.

Ada yang bilang make hijab  itu susah, berat, panas, ngap dan lain sebagainya. Saya pake kata umumnya disini, habisnya kalo kerudung atau jilbab hanya menunjuk sebagian tipe pemakaian. Sebenarnya hijab ga gitu lho. Kalo hijab dipakai atas dasar hati yang memang cinta kepada Allah, rasanya akan sangat mudah dan malah terasa sangat menyenangkan. Benar lho makenya harus ikhlas, kalo nggak, hijabnya malah jadi fitnah bagi si pemakainya sendiri, kalo udah gitu sayang kan, yang make hijab tapi pakaiannya ketat dan malah menonjolkan lekuk badan si perempuan.
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Jadi make hijab itu harus amanah? Iya dong, secara itu adalah bentuk ketaatan seorang hamba kepada Allah. Hukumnya wajib bagi perempuan yang akil baligh atau hukumannya ganjaran 50.000 tahun di neraka untuk setiap tarikan nafas perempuan tanpa hijab. Ngeri ya, tapi hukum Allah adalah jelas, mengikat dan memang mengandung manfaat.
Berikut manfaat hijab :
  • Terhindar dari tatapan mata-mata laki-laki jahil yang ga tau adat dan pandangan ga sopan yang ngeliat badan perempuan ampe gimanaaa gitu. Ga banget deh, bikin jengah.
  • Terlindungi dari kejahatan. Emang bukan jaminan sepenuhnya sih, tapi seenggaknya orang lebih malu dan respek kalo berhadapan dengan perempuan yang memakai hijab penuh.
  • Terhindar dari debu dan segala kotoran di jalan. Beneran loh, coba bandingin ama perempuan yang ga pake hijab, muka, rambut, tangan ama kakinya ditempeli debu yang beterbangan di jalan. Makanya ga salah kalo Rasulullah menyebut kaum muslimin sebagai kaum yang bersih 
  • Lebih leluasa bergerak. Kata siapa hijab bikin pemiliknya jadi letoy dan lambat? Itu cuma perspektif sempit. Hjab bikin lebih bebas bergerak karena ga perlu takut kalo anggota badan yang keliatan secara semuanya ketutupan.
  • Ga repot. Coba deh perhatiin gimana gaya perempuan yang mesti ke mall tapi dandannya naudzubillah tebel, ribet dan lama. Buat styling rambut butuh waktu minimal 30 menit, belum lagi make vitaminnya, make hairspraynya dan blablabla, belum lagi muka yang ditambal pelembab, alas bedak, foundation, concealer, bedak, lipstik, maskara dan macem tambalan palsu lainnya. Kalo pake kerudung misalnya, cuma butuh waktu 5 menit and you are ready to go.
  • Memelihara kesehatan rambut. Dengan pake hijab, rambut terhindar dari panas yang bikin rambut kering, styling yang merusak, dan bebas debu.
  • Memelihara kelembaban kulit. Kulit yang terlindungi hijab bakal terasa lebih lembut, ga kering apalagi pecah – pecah. Terutama aktivitas di bawah sinar matahari yang garang maupun aktivitas perkantoran yang disembur ac yang bikin semriwing.
  • Membawa kedamaian hati. Hijab secara alam bawah sadar jadi pengingat dalam bertindak. Orang dengan hijab bakal lebih hati-hati dalam bersikap dan berkata-kata karena ingat tanggungjawabnya kepada Allah.
  • Menambah kecantikan aura wanita. Perempuan yang pake hijab pasti terlihat lebih adem dibandingkan perempuan yang cantik tapi ga hijab-an. Bener, karena hijab bikin cantiknya jadi beda 
  • Jadi penyelamat di hari akhir. Di akhirat nanti, semua perbuatan kita bakal di pertanggungjawabkan termasuk kaki, tangan dan semua indra yang kita miliki. Bayangin coba kalo anggota badan kita disiksa dengan pedihnya di neraka cuma karena kita lengah dengan perintah dasar yang satu ini. Inget, badan kita bukanlah milik kita semata, ia adalah kepunyaan Allah, jadi harus dikembalikan sebaik Allah memberikannya saat kita lahir.
Dan masih banyak ribuan kebaikan lain dalam hijab. Sebuah perintah sederhana namun besar manfaatnya. Mari tingkatkan ketakwaan kita hanya kepada Allah SWT semata ya!
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Iman, A reminder

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Iman secara harfiah adalah segala sesuatu yang diyakini dalam hati, diucapkan dengan lisan dan diwujudkan dengan perbuatan.

Iman merupakan kunci yang menyatukan manusia dengan Rabb yang telah menciptakannya. Hati yang dipenuhi cahaya iman akan mendatangkan kebahagiaan sekaligus kedamaian yang hakiki bagi pemiliknya. Akan tetapi iman tak ada bedanya dengan pohon. Bila sebuah pohon dipelihara dengan baik, diberi nutrisi dengan kadar air yang cukup dan dipangkas dengan rapi pada cabang-cabangnya untuk menghilangkan hama yang mengganggu, maka pohon tersebut akan menjadi pohon yang rimbun sejuk, berakar kuat, tak tergoyahkan dan pada akhirnya mendatangkan buah yang manis bagi empunya pohon. Akan tetapi bila pohon tidak dirawat dengan baik, pohon tersebut dengan mudah terserang hama bahkan mungkin menjadi layu, rusak di percabangannya dan mati.

Merawat iman dapat diibaratkan seperti merawat pohon diatas. Iman perlu di-refresh dari waktu ke waktu agar hati tetap dapat mencintai Allah dengan ikhlas. Hati yang dipenuhi iman mendatangkan keluasan jiwa dan menimbulkan sikap yang positif. Tapi hati yang imannya kering, mudah sekali di ombang-ambingkan oleh permasalahan hidup. Hal kecil jadi besar dan hal yang besar terasa seperti gempa bumi yang siap menelan si empunya.

Memelihara iman banyak caranya. Iman dapat bertambah melalui pertemuan majelis taklim, obrolan dengan teman yang banyak ilmu (ga boleh bercampur dengan ghibah lho yaa), membaca buku yang bermanfaat dan terutama sekali rajin – rajin membaca dan mempelajari ilmu agama, tauhid, fiqih, hadits dan Al-Qur’an.

Tidak ada salahnya bila iman kita kadang menjadi lemah, karena tempat manusia itu adalah salah, lemah dan dosa. Tapi juga perlu diingat untuk selalu memperbaiki iman, karena ialah yang menentukan pencapaian kita di akhirat kelak. Pasti ga pada mau kalo masuk neraka kan? 
Remember, Islam is the Empire of Faith!

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Always Looking On The Brightside